This Is Water

On a hot, humid day in August 2011, I sat in a beanbag chair on the top floor of Bings Barn, a cabin at Camp Stella Maris. It was here where I listened to Ryan read me the most influential speech of my life to this day. David Foster Wallace’s 2005 commencement speech at Kenyon College, also known as “This is Water,” changed my life. It was in this moment, sweaty in my beanbag chair, when I had the epiphany that I needed to take a step back from my worries and think about what is really important in my life.

It is not often that people take a moment from their daily activities to stop and think about the beauty of their lives. It’s a cliché that most people look over until something drastic happens to make them realize it, but it shouldn’t take any negative experience to make you want to understand how lucky you truly are; the happy moments are what should make you appreciate all that you have and all that you will get to experience someday. As a human, the most complex species of animal ever to exist, it’s important to understand that it is impossible for you to comprehend every aspect of your life, but you must still have the desire to try. I am eighteen years old with, hopefully, most of my life still ahead of me, with plenty of lessons to learn, but I am looking forward to every second of it. Growing older is exciting and terrifying because of its uncertainty. There are unlimited lessons to be learned from each individual’s past, present, and future. However, the most important and definite truth I know is that learning from your own life will only be as effective as you make it.

Another cliché that I will always hold close to my heart is that there is a positive way to look at everything. However, most people either don’t believe they have the ability to realistically think that way, or they just find comfort in feeling sorry for themselves. I have no problem admitting that I have many days like that. But it also worries me that, upon hearing the world “past,” many people’s first thoughts are the negative experiences which sent them through the ultimate low periods of their lives. Although everyone’s past has countless encounters of sadness, it has just as many encounters of happiness. Everything you see as negative history came from something you cared about; every ounce of pain you’ve ever felt from someone leaving your life, for any amount of time, was only felt because of the happy moments you shared with that person. Caring about someone is a beautiful emotion to feel, and sadness is only existent at the end of something wonderful: that’s why you should have no regrets for your past. Every experience you’ve ever had can teach you something about yourself, in that your own reactions to events will help you to understand what is important to you. No one else can understand you more than you can because no one has felt your exact emotions. Someday, when someone asks you what your biggest regret is, I hope you can honestly say that you don’t have one. I hope you can truly believe that everything you’ve been through creates a magnificent repertoire of experiences from which you will continue to learn.

Every aspect of your life at this moment is a part of your “present,” which is essential to your current emotions. These are the things that I wish people took the time to stop and appreciate. Every person around you is going through something, good or bad, that no one else totally understands. Every person you know has a distinct personality, unique to everyone else, which is remarkable in its own way. This fact of life makes me want to get to know as many people as possible. Everyone’s present is centered on unique beliefs and feelings. Everything is constantly changing, and if you fail to appreciate your life as it is now, you will wish you had in the future.

Thinking about my future is one of my biggest fears because of its uncertainty. If there’s one important piece of advice you should take from all of this, it’s that your future is in your hands. The only truth I know about this entire issue is that the amount of effort you put into your future is equivalent to the amount you’ll get out of it.

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